"Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore, as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing." Ephesians 5:22 - 24
NOOOO! Why did THIS have to be in the Bible? I think, as a woman, that this is one of the hardest passages to read. I grew up in the "I am woman, hear me roar" era of feminism. You know, "a woman can do everything as well as a man"...which sometimes morphs into "a woman can do everything BETTER than a man." Men in our culture are portrayed in some very demeaning ways, and I'm afraid that men as well as women have bought into the hype. Even as Christian women, we seem to think we're exempt from this passage, because, of course, why would you submit to someone who doesn't know what he's doing? Well, ladies, I believe we are only perpetuating the problem. Everyone cannot be a leader in the church or the marketplace. There are many places where men need to follow others, and sometimes those others are even women. However, men are called to be leaders in their homes. The old phrase "A man's home is his castle" implies that here is one place, at least, where he reigns as king. Good or bad, a king still reigns over his constituents. We, as wives and children, do NOT have the right to usurp the throne. What king would stay in a castle that has been taken over by another monarch? Is it any wonder that our husbands escape into worlds of their own, when their castle has been taken from them? Believe me, this is a very new revelation to me. I have recently realized that I have been guilty of trying to take over. I thought I was doing what was best for my family, and stepping in where things needed doing. Unfortunately, this has even (maybe especially) been happening in spiritual matters, all while I bemoaned the fact that my husband was not being a spiritual leader in the home. However, I have recognized that I need to give the king back his throne. I read a definition of "submit" which basically explained it as doing whatever you can for the person. Our job as wives is to make life BETTER for our husbands, in any way we can. I think a man who is held to such esteem would be much more effective as a leader of his family. The second part of the passage says that we are to submit to our husbands as the church is subject under Christ. Our marriages are a prototype of the marriage of Jesus to the church. If we are not subject to our husbands, we cannot be subject to God. OUCH! All of this "spiritual leadership" stuff just got smashed, didn't it? How could I have considered myself to be more spiritual and capable of leading my family into a right relationship with Christ, when I couldn't even manage the human equivalent, and be in a right relationship to my husband? Well, I find I've got a lot of 'splainin' to do! This Sunday is Father's Day. Wives and children, let's put our men back on the throne!